Are You Afraid To Be Happy?

It is normal for people to have phobias. Most of us know someone who is afraid of spiders or heights, for example. However, it is not normal to be afraid of being happy. Being “repulsed” by happiness can be a serious problem for a person’s health and well-being.

The fear of being happy stems from several things. An overly strict upbringing, too many areas of responsibility or loneliness are some possible reasons. In this article, we share some strategies to help you overcome this fear.

How can you stop sabotaging your own happiness?

1. Identify self-destructive habits

First and foremost, you should identify your self-destructive habits. These can be things you routinely do or things you only do now and then, which have a lasting impact.

When you feel guilty or overwhelmed by a particular emotion, it can be helpful to notice the situation that caused the emotion. That way, after the moment has passed, you can visit it and rephrase it. Once you have done that, it will be less likely that the same thing will come back to ruin a pleasant moment again.

2. Fighting against yourself feeds fear

Some people flee from peace as if it were a storm. They can not understand the concept of a worry-free life. So if they do not see anything to worry about here and now, they use binoculars to look for such things in the future.

They are not comfortable or familiar with peace, quiet or tranquility. They only rest when they sleep at night. It is as if they are always preparing for a big event.

In general, we are talking about the kind of people who take “prevention is the best medicine” to the extreme. They are in a constant struggle to be ahead of any potential danger, which is actually dangerous in itself. This is because this lifestyle is like an endless attack on your health.

3. Avoid and reject restrictions

Sometimes we set limits for ourselves. One of them is not to express what we think and feel. If you impose this rule on yourself and follow it, it will be very difficult for others to get to know you or help you.

Moreover, this lack of emotional expression does not only have to do with negative emotions such as anger or sadness. For many people, even positive emotions end up in straitjackets. They believe that letting happiness appear is simply a sin. In fact, this idea is the central theme of Umberto Eco’s most famous book, The Name of the Rose .

4. Enjoy your happiness

Another thing that is important to keep in mind is that happiness has very little to do with justice. No matter how hard you work for something, you will still experience disappointment. On the other hand, life sometimes surprises with unexpected pleasures that you feel you do not “deserve”. Thus, the most important thing is to enjoy what comes your way.

Why are you afraid to be happy?

When you think you can overcome this fear, try to find out where it comes from. What things have fueled this particular emotional state? Identifying them should be your primary goal.

1. Therapy is helpful in overcoming fear

Do you feel that the fear of being happy is a black hole from which you can not escape? Do you feel worse every time you have a good time? If the answer is yes, the help of a professional therapist can help you analyze the root of the problem more objectively. They can also help you find possible solutions.

Do not be embarrassed to ask for help. Do you feel embarrassed to go to the doctor for a physical problem? Remember that your mental health is just as important as your physical health.

Get help from the people you love

Your family and friends are good support systems when you have problems. They can help find solutions, be a discussion group for your ideas, and give you a new perspective. Getting opinions and genuine support from people who love you is a wonderful approach. As such, sharing your feelings with friends or family is great for seeing your issues from a different perspective.

In addition, having the support and opinions of others will keep you from feeling lonely. This way, you will be less likely to be afraid of being happy. Not only that, but this kind of support tends to be mutual. If you ask for help, others will probably ask you for help in return. As a result, you will build mutual support relationships that provide benefits to all involved.