The Reason Why The Wolf In Little Red Riding Hood Is Not Naughty

Our world has grown a lot in recent decades. It can make it difficult to stop and think about what you are doing and saying to your children. How many times have you said or heard someone say something like “Karsten, don’t hit your sister, it’s bad”. It’s definitely familiar to me. I have heard it a lot and even said it myself. But what do we really say when we say that someone is naughty?

Of course it is not okay for Karsten to beat his sister, but to tell him that he is “naughty” is perhaps going too far. I think one of the most important things we can try to be more aware of is to separate the action, the child’s behavior, from who the child is. You must be able to distinguish between the action and the person and be careful with labels.

The danger of labels and why the wolf in Little Red Riding Hood is not naughty

I’m sure if Karsten’s dad says that to him, it’s because he’s done something wrong, and he should not behave like that.

But here’s the thing. The inappropriate part of it is the action itself, not Karsten. If you constantly confront your child’s actions and behavior with who they are, you will probably end up lowering their self-esteem over time, without realizing it. Saying “You are thoughtless” (personality) and “It was thoughtless” (behavior) are far apart.

This is part of the reason why I have always found it so interesting that children say that the wolf in Little Red Riding Hood is naughty. We give the wolf the personality trait (“naughty”) just because he wants to eat Little Red Riding Hood.

The conclusion is simple: If he wants to eat her, it’s because he’s naughty. Only bad people would do something like that.

After reading and hearing many wolf stories like Little Red Riding Hood, The Three Little Pigs, The Wolf and the Seven Little Goats, and Peter and the Wolf, we have decided that they are naughty because they will hurt the main characters. Thus, we describe them as “bad”, although this is not necessarily the case.

Of course, the wolf is not naughty. The wolf wants to eat Little Red Riding Hood because he is hungry, not because he is naughty. Explaining it to your children can help them have more realistic, healthy, and positive expectations of the world. Poor wolves, look what a bad reputation they get! Try to change the way you describe the characters from stories like these.

The art of describing behavior

Luis Cencillo was a philosopher and psychologist who liked to use a concept that I think is very practical: ” resemantization” . The root of this word comes from “semantics”, the linguistic study of meaning. So what this means is to change the description of something to make it more flexible.

For example, instead of saying that a child is weird and evasive, you can give them a new label as shy. Think about how hard it is to get rid of the label once you put it there! It is as psychologist Alberto Soler says. It is easy to put a label on something or someone, but much harder to take it off.

To explain it better, Soler likes to use the metaphor for jar labels. Once you have tagged a child (nervous, bad, smart, helpful, restless, etc.), it will be difficult to remove the label, even if you see something that goes against it. The point is: be careful with the labels you give people, especially children.

We tend to act in a way that is consistent with the labels or prejudices we project beyond. We also tend to accept labels. Henry Ford had a good quote that fit these sentences: “Either you think you can, or you think you can not – you are right.”

Another useful story that someone “is naughty”

One story I love to use to explain the negative side of accepting a label or a role is “Galton’s Walk. ” Francis Galton was a sibling of Charles Darwin. One morning he went into a park and thought he was the worst person in the world. He did not talk to anyone. He just stayed in his own mind and thought about how awful he was.

How do you think Galton felt about the people he crossed paths with on the trip? Most of the people he passed would move away from him and look at him in fear. Surprising, right? That is the power of labels.

I want to go back to the explanation of why the wolf is not naughty. All in all, I am convinced that there is no such thing as a bad child. But you will still hear people say “X is naughty” all the time. There is always a reason behind problematic behavior.

I’m not saying you should justify the behavior (far from it). I just think it’s important to understand why a child behaves in a certain way. Thus, the best thing you can do with your children and students is to describe behaviors instead of qualifying them or labeling them.

Take time to think about the explanations and labels you use with your children and the consequences they may have. The way you look at things can help make your mind more flexible, healthy and open.