It’s Easier To Talk To Strangers Than Acquaintances

Hundreds of years ago, Lucius Annaeus Seneca said that “One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is understanding and being understood.” What happens when you feel that your friends or loved ones do not understand you? Maybe talking to strangers is a way to make up for this lack of quality in your relationships. Is it normal that it is easier for you to talk to a stranger than people you know? What are the causes of this strange phenomenon?

This behavior can be considered normal, or at least natural. Certain types of people find it especially difficult to relate to the people they know. It is difficult for them to do so because they lack self-confidence. The reason for their insecurity is that they are afraid that other people will have negative opinions about them.

Why is it easier to talk to strangers?

It may not be that difficult for you to talk to strangers. We also refer to establishing any kind of relationship or communication with another person, such as talking to someone in the locker room at the gym or participating in a conversation at work.

Maybe you feel shy or modest when a friend, family member or someone you know is with you. In other words, you feel uncomfortable. You are afraid of what they will believe and you do not want them to have a bad opinion of you. Furthermore, you do not want them to discover your faults or shortcomings. In reality, this is related to the negative image you have of yourself. In a way, you are actually ashamed of your body, your social skills or another quality.

The thing is, when you talk to strangers, the topics you are discussing are usually insignificant or common. Either way, it’s like following a script in your head that you remember by heart and are comfortable with. In addition, you can even play another character, who is the person you want to be instead of who you really are. This is possible because the communication between you will probably not last long, and it is unlikely that you will ever see the stranger again.

Even psychologists believe that it is beneficial to communicate with strangers. According to a study by Dr. Elizabeth Dunn, a professor at the Department of Psychology at the University of British Columbia, talking to strangers can make people feel more cheerful, behave more pleasantly and feel at home in a community.

Why are you open to talking to strangers?

The reason for this behavior is the insignificance of the conversation. If you work directly with customers, you may have no problem being nice to people you do not know. Most of the time you know you want to talk about the weather or how you are feeling, and you probably will not see them again.

However, as the conversation begins to become more intimate, you may need to show your true self to the other person. This is where the fear of judgment comes in. Your modesty prevents you from showing who you really are.

You do not worry about what strangers think of you. You’re just worried about the opinions of people you’re close to or have become acquainted with.

It is clear that the more intimate you are with a person, the more they will focus on your positive qualities, but they will also see your flaws. Maybe what that person thinks of you will be difficult for you to accept.

What should you do if you find yourself in this situation?

Clinical psychologist Encarni Muños suggests a number of tips that you can follow when talking to people you know:

• When talking to a person you know, think about what you are afraid of and what you think will happen. Then keep in mind that it probably won’t be as bad as you think.
• Realize that you can not hide behind a mask for the rest of your life. Whether you like it or not, you can not please everyone. Sometimes people will reject you and you just have to learn to live with it.
• Maybe your secrets are not so shocking. Are they really something to be ashamed of?
• Maybe you’re afraid of getting hurt. Even if you live in an armor, far away from the outside world, you will end up harming yourself, namely because you can not trust anyone and therefore do not develop the necessary social skills you need to live in society.

• You should not be afraid to show who you really are. Even if you have faults and weaknesses, you also have strengths and virtues. Correct your mistakes if you do not like them instead of hiding them from the people who trust you. Remember that everyone has their own.

Conclusion

It is relatively common to feel calm while talking to strangers and uncomfortable when talking to people you are close to, but it does not have to be that way. Ideally, you should feel comfortable with the people you know.

If you have this problem, try to avoid making much of your communication to avoid the tension and anxiety they cause you. This will let you have peace with yourself.