Virginia Satir’s Five Freedoms To Strengthen Your Self-Esteem

Loving ourselves is a task that is “outstanding” for most of us. Valuing ourselves and treating ourselves with care should not be a secondary thing in our routine, but it should be something that is on our minds every day. Prioritizing ourselves is fundamental if we want to achieve the freedom that comes with emotional and social well-being. There are five freedoms to help us with this. 

Only when we treat ourselves with respect and dignity can we develop our full potential and at the same time build strong and healthy relationships with others. Self-awareness is the key to forging deep bonds with others. So, how do we find this key? What can we do to begin to love ourselves?

The five freedoms of Virginia Satire can help us with this. They are a collection of powerful affirmations created to start the process of personal development that will strengthen our self-confidence. Let’s go deeper.

Virginia Satir’s Five Freedoms

The freedom to be

The first of Virginia Satir’s five freedoms is related to the importance of being authentic and alive in the present  instead of sailing through the depths of the past and the currents of the future.

Our thoughts can take us many paths, but some of them will give us a sense of guilt and make us lose time. Others want to create fictional realities that trap us precisely because they show us what we want. That said, where we focus our attention and our journey is up to ourselves…

The key is to establish a deep connection with ourselves. If we do this, the ghosts of the past will disappear, as well as fears of the future and fantasies. Only then will we be able to focus our attention on the present. Only then can we float and be ourselves, free from filters, masks and disturbances.

The freedom to decide what one thinks and feels

In most cases, we worry that our words and thoughts are not good enough. We worry that they will not be approved by others. As a result, we do not express half of what we really think and feel. Virginia Satir’s five freedoms help us decide what we think and feel.

By doing this we hide ourselves. Instead of creating authentic relationships, we construct unstable bonds and false modesty. This is a double betrayal. First, we betray ourselves by rejecting our true selves, and second, we betray others by hiding who we really are. That said, do not forget that we too can choose to say nothing, as long as it is a personal decision and not one imposed by others or what others expect to hear.

There is nothing wrong with expressing our feelings and thoughts.  Provided we do so with respect and emotional responsibility. In fact, it is the best thing to do if we want others to get to know us and accept us as we are, and if we want to create real relationships.

The freedom to feel

This is one of the most challenging of Virginia Satir’s five freedoms, because no one has taught us how to figure out how we feel. First, remember that every single one of our emotions is valid.  We do not need to suppress or block them, on the contrary, we should deepen the art of self-understanding.

When we know that we are free to live and experience every single one of our emotions, we may feel that it is  important to train ourselves to recognize our emotional language.  At times, there are occasions when sadness is hidden behind fear or expressed through anger. The most important thing is to listen, to focus on how we feel to get to know each of our emotions, so that we can deal with them later.

The emotional world that each of us has in us is a map that not only helps us discover who we are, but also helps us understand others. Because if we do not know how others feel, it will be difficult to respond to their needs and vice versa.

The freedom to ask

We can not wait for opportunities and people to come and knock on our door, and we deserve more than what just falls into our hands. One of Virginia Satir’s five freedoms is the freedom to choose and to ask.

People with low self-esteem are often used to acting only when someone gives them permission, as a result of their insecurity. It is as if they cannot decide for themselves because someone has deprived them of this right. Even if someone has made them feel that way over the years, it’s never too late to wake up and raise their own voice to make themselves visible.

When we know who we are and how to express ourselves, the next big step is to be able to express what we want. This way we can later look for it and take a risk.

The freedom to take a risk

The last of Virginia Satir’s five freedoms is about taking a risk and leaving our comfort zone. The comfort zone can at times seem like a refuge, despite the fact that it can be uncomfortable.

If we want to grow and move forward, we must take action in our own lives.  Of course, we must also take responsibility for the consequences of our own actions. Only in this way are we able to accept what is happening and to learn from it. As long as we hold on to this sense of security, we will not be able to confront the uncertainty face to face, nor will we learn.

As we can see, Virginia Satir has five freedoms that are an ode to self-love. They are a collection of affirmations that invite us to reflect on how much we value ourselves and how genuine we are with others.